31 “A man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.  33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Chapter 6 vs 1. Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.  2-3 “Honour your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” 4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 5:31-6:4 (English Standard Version)

I've included the end of Chapter 5 from the last study with today’s verses from Chapter 6 because it places it all in the setting of the family. Christian fathers are called to love the mother of their children, and Christian mothers are to show respect to the children's father. In each case, they are setting an example of how a Christian child should also love and respect both mom and dad. However, what’s the stronger word Paul uses for children towards parents than what he had used for a wife towards her husband. (vs 1)

Wives were called to ‘submit’ to the husband's headship in the home; children are called to be obedient to both parents. It's the same word that's used for a servant’s behaviour towards a master. This is consistent with the Old Testament's teaching that rebellious children were to be strongly disciplined. What does Paul give as the first reason for such obedience? (vs 1)

It's the right thing to do! And I'm sure the implication is that it’s the right thing in God's sight , to do. That's a better reason than for parents to say, as they often do, 'Because I told you so.' Children need to be taught what's right in God's eyes, and not to follow what friends may do in their homes. What is another good reason for children to obey their parents? (vs 2-3)

That's a far reaching statement. In vs 31 above Paul had already quoted an Old Testament verse as a basis for what marriage is meant to be. Now he quotes words from Moses in Exodus 20:2 as a basis for healthy family living. What those words imply is that stable families result in stable nations. When homes have love, respect and discipline, they produce sensible citizens. But if homes are in chaos and children aren’t disciplined, it flows onto the streets. Crime becomes common, corruption is embraced, nations crumble.

A big danger in Paul's instructions to children is that they could be treated so strictly and with such harshness that, even worse than rebelling, they could grow up with hatred towards their parents and towards the gospel. So what does Paul say to the dad's to prevent that? (vs 4)

By speaking to dad's, Paul reminds them that they need to take responsibility for their children. Many dad's neglect this. But he's also noting that it may be dad's who are more likely to be too harsh and severe. He urges them to take great care that they are consistent and fair in how they speak to their children and deal with matters needing discipline. But what is the even more important thing dad's need also to be involved in with regard to the children? (Sill in vs 4)

They are to seek to bring the children up in the instruction of the Lord. Dad's, with mom's help, must bring God's word into the home. They need to lay the foundation of the gospel, praying that their children will surrender their lives to the Lord Jesus Christ. When faithfully done, this often results in a child turning to Jesus at an early age. And then parents should seek to build on that foundation with what the Bible teaches about living in the way Jesus calls us to live. Parent's need to model that in their own lives. And they need to be much in prayer, both for themselves and for their children, asking God that 'it may go well with them, and that may live long in the land.’ Healthy homes are homes where Jesus is truly Lord.